Does this make you laugh?

Dec 29, 2017

 
 
 
It's time to take a break and laugh.
Erma Bombeck was an American humorist, syndicated columnist, and best-selling author. Her bi-weekly column was read by 30 million readers. She wrote more than fifteen books with titles like, Family – The Ties That Bind….and Gag, and, If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits? Her humor chronicled the ordinary life of a Midwestern suburban housewife. Here are quotes from her column and books that made me laugh out loud. I hope they do the same for you.
 
When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out.
Cats invented self-esteem.
When mothers talk about the depression of the empty nest, they're not mourning the passing of all those wet towels on the floor, or the music that numbs your teeth, or even the bottle of capless shampoo dribbling down the shower drain. They're upset because they've gone from supervisor of a child's life to a spectator. It's like being the vice president of the United States.
 
All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.
My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved off the dessert cart.
 
My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.
It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.
When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'.
 
Which one is your favorite? Let me know.
Mine is the one about cats inventing self esteem.

 

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